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dailyfatspiration:

When I was eight, my parents divorced and my mother and I moved to San Diego from Mexico. Between the culture shock of coming from another country and the stigma of having an accent (I heard my share of “Do you have a green card?” jokes), I always felt like I stuck out. On top of all that, I was a lot taller and bigger-boned than most girls my age. My mom did a great job of raising me; this story is not about her. But I think she was very critical of her own body and projected that onto me. There were times when she felt she needed to lose 20 pounds, and therefore I also needed to lose 20 pounds. The mentality was, we should lose weight. As a result, I grew up wanting to look like someone else rather than appreciating the body I had.

Then in tenth grade, my teachers found out I could sing, and the seas parted. I got cast in my first musical and was suddenly catapulted into this place where I was getting a lot of attention, admiration and praise. I even got accepted to The Juilliard School, a prestigious performing arts school in New York City.

The school was full of actresses, singers, dancers…and a lot of them had eating disorders. For me, the body-image issues came in waves. I would diet hard-core, lose a lot of weight and feel really good about myself. Then I would have moments of unhappiness. My way of dealing was to eat and eat and eat; I’d gain lots of weight and feel really crappy. Somewhere along the line, all the self-esteem I’d felt went out the window. My weight constantly yo-yoed—at my slimmest I was a size 6; my biggest, a 14.

Right before graduation, I was cast in Paul Simon’s Broadway musical, The Capeman—the story of a Puerto Rican gangster in New York City. It was one of my bigger phases, but people were so supportive of my singing that size didn’t matter. (I do remember an agent or a casting director I met saying that, when it came to weight, “New York tends to be more forgiving than Hollywood.” I thought, wow, that’s interesting, what exactly are they forgiving me for?) The truth is, unlike TV and film cameras, the theater stage doesn’t add 10 pounds.

After the musical ended, I made a conscious decision to break into television. I basically starved myself, living on a stick of celery, some peanut butter and two protein shakes a day and working out like a fiend. Sure enough, I lost 25 pounds and booked a TV pilot—scary, because it was almost like a reward for treating myself in an unhealthy way. The pilot didn’t get picked up though; eventually I fell back into a regular eating pattern.

But then I decided to move to L.A. to see if I could land more roles. When I walked into an audition room, there would be a lot of petite women with giant boobs. I was almost always the largest girl there. The pressure to be thinner got to me immediately. My old insecurities came flooding back. I started taking these crazy diet pills. They came in a blue bottle that said “ephedra-free.” I didn’t know what was in there (maybe caffeine?), but I did know they were horrible for me. They made my heart race, but I felt I needed them. After six months, my body had had enough. I could feel myself getting shakier, and I grew more and more scared knowing I was putting my heart in danger. Addiction runs in my family—my grandfather was an alcoholic—and realizing that I was getting hooked on the pills was difficult for me. So one day I just stopped. I threw out the pill bottle and said, I’m not going to do this to myself anymore. I was still vulnerable, still hating myself, but I had definitely taken a step toward a healthier place.

Then in May 2004, I got cast [as the female lead] in the musical Spamalot and moved back to New York. We did eight shows a week. It was the most I’ve ever had to sing, so I had to learn to take care of my voice—a lot of sleep, a lot of rest, a lot of water. But it turned into more than just taking care of my voice. It was taking care of all of me. I finally started to eat when I was hungry and to not eat when I wasn’t. I took yoga classes and got healthy. The show gave me confidence that had nothing to do with how I looked; I won a 2005 Tony Award for that role.

Now I’m a regular on Grey’s Anatomy as orthopedic surgeon Dr. Callie Torres. On the set, there’s catered food everywhere you look—I gained 25 pounds in four months! My energy level was low and I felt unhealthy, so I decided on my own to get a trainer. What’s funny is nobody from the show ever pressured me about it. Nobody ever said, “You’re getting a little heavy.” Instead they wrote scenes for me to dance around half-naked in my underwear! I went to Shonda Rhimes, the executive producer, and said, “Do you really want me to do this? Why me? I have so much cottage cheese here and there!” She just looked at me and said, “Work it.” That was all I got from her. And sure enough, doing the scene helped me get over a lot of my issues. I had to accept my body.

And now? I’m not going to lie: I still have days when I walk by the mirror on my way to the shower and think, oh God, I didn’t just see that! But I’ve learned to stop myself and ask, am I being realistic? What do I love about my body? What am I grateful for? The answers to those questions remind me that I’m very blessed.

(Source| Glamour)

Submitted by weareindangerofcrashing! Thanks so much!

anywherebutsweden:

hollow-gram:

Plus-size model Katie Halchishick in O Magazine, measuring the gap between healthy beauty and the toxic ideal

Sad that they call her a plus-size model, when she really is a normal-sized model.

(via navabifashion)

redefiningbodyimage:

thegoodgero:

hotfornewzealand:

dietheathy:

healthystrawberry:

This is a picture of me and my two gorgeous best friends. Clearly, we all have very different body types, and you know what? None of us is healthier, prettier or happier than the others because of it.

That’s me on the left. I’m short, super petite, and have about as much muscle mass as a blob of gelatin. Despite being naturally thin, I have always been far from in shape. Not even a month ago, running two minutes at a time was a struggle—now I can run without stopping for more than a half hour.

Felicia, in the center, is probably the most active girl I know. The opposite of me, she’s one of those people that can build muscle just by looking in the direction of a dumbbell. She loves running like I do, and we’ve discussed running a 5k. She’s a big yoga enthusiast and has tried all sorts of different forms that I can’t pronounce, and she’s found free community yoga classes for us to attend together. Also, she has abs of steel, seriously. She’s helping me with my ab workouts. She’s also recently lost over 60 lbs through her active lifestyle and healthy diet.

That’s my friend Maddy on the right. She’s curvy and feminine, but she’s a beast in the gym. Strength training is her thing. She could probably bench press two of me. Not only is she incredibly strong, she’s insanely flexible and an avid pole dancer. We’re taking classes together even though she can spin circles around me on that damn pole, and look gorgeous while she does it.

My friends inspire me so much, and remind me that diversity is lovely. You don’t have to be skinny to be beautiful and confident, nor do you have to look like girls in Nike ads to be strong and fit. You don’t need to weigh a certain number, fit into a certain size, or have a certain appearance to be confident, healthy, or happy. I think that my friends prove that to me.
 
I’ll never be long and willowy like a supermodel, or well-built like all those fitspo girls. I’ll never look like either of my friends, and they’ll never look like me. And that’s ok, because fitness is about being the best you can be, not comparing yourself to others.


Embrace what you have, and help others embrace what they have. Fitness is funner with friends. Get them involved. Take a class, go for a walk, make a healthy dinner together. You’ll always have support and a fun activity to bond over.

This is probably the most amazing post on Tumblr.

So much love for all of you <333

:)

why do i suddenly feel so much better about myself?

<3

(via missperspective)

ilikeprettyclothes:

pearlconcubine:

allthefeathersandstones:

healthystrawberry:

This makes me feel more confident

the top layer used to be my outlook every god damn day. SO MUCH PROGRESS FOR MY MENTAL HEALTH

So true for me as well.  Things like this remind me how much progress I’ve made.  Pats on the back for Tegan and Maryam.  :)

Yeah, I was there too. Seriously, what a nice reminder about how much things have improved!

annieelainey:

Today is one of those days when I look in the mirror and think, “DAMN, WHY, WHY, WHY DID I THINK I WAS UGLY? Why did I allow others to influence my self-esteem and my beliefs? Why when a commercial told me that I should lose weight, I would listen and agree? Why did I deeply consider getting a nose job?”

Would being skinny and having a smaller nose make me a happier person? No! Happiness starts from the inside out, not from the outside in. I allowed people to influence me into thinking that I was some kind of monster, that I should always feel ashamed of my body because it’s never good enough, that I should never wear a bathing suit in public, that I am supposed to look a certain way and if I fail to do so then I am an inadequate human being and it’s all false, false, FALSE!

Today, I feel pretty… and I like it. No one can take this feeling away.

BE BRAVE! JOIN THE REVOLUTION!

(via annieelainey)

stophatingyourbody:

Self explanatory :)

BE BRAVE! JOIN THE REVOLUTION!